In the winter of 2019 I took a surfing lesson in Costa Rica. I fell in love–the sun and salt water on my skin, the beautiful view of the beach, the spray off the back of the waves, the loud crashing of translucent turquoise, and the feeling of power, ease, flow and grace as I stood on a board, using the energy of the earth to fly across water.
The problem was, however, I would be going home in a week to a landlocked part of the world that spends a lot of its months covered in ice.
It was depressing.
Then I met a girl from Toronto, a psychotherapist who worked at a clinic just down the street from my old one.
“You can surf in Toronto, you know”, she informed me.
Where? I thought, astounded.
“On the lakes!” She exclaimed.
I was flabbergasted–perhaps I could be a surfer after all. The beach bum lifestyle, the rock hard abs, the zinc oxide cheek bones, the chronically wet hair, watching the winds and tides and slipping out for a sun-soaked hour during a work break. Could this be true–could you surf the Great Lakes?
“The thing is,” she continued, “the surf season is from October to March”.
Oh.
Winter surfing.
It was still interested, though.
Back in Toronto, I waited for the next strong February East wind and headed to a surf spot I’d heard about on Lake Ontario. I was met with a crowd of black neoprene-clad surfers, soaked by water, wind and sleet. The elements were harsh. The stoke, however, was infectious.
Ok, I could do this, I thought.
My next stop was the surf shop. I purchased gear and the rest is history.
Not a lot of us are built to slip into near-freezing water during the frigid winter months to catch a few waves. Lake waves are harder to catch, the currents are strong, ice chunks are a thing to watch out for, and… it’s friggin’ cold! But, surfing is surfing. The lakes provide beautiful landscapes, just like the ocean, and the feeling of catching a wave and riding it is the same.
There’s also the benefit of body hardening.
We modern humans are very different from our hunter-gatherer ancestors. Our genes may be the same, but our lifestyles couldn’t be further apart. Down-filled jackets and central heating protect us from the discomfort of the elements. In a sense, our lives are temperature controlled.
However, our incidence of chronic degenerative disease has never been higher.
Body hardening practices involves exposure against natural stimuli, such as intense cold, that results in increased resilience–resistance to disease and improved health.
A 1998 study in QJM: an international journal of medicine looked at antioxidant production in German winter swimmers.
Winter swimming, just like winter surfing, is a thing. As of the 90s, there were 3000 Germans who participated in winter swimming clubs. They were known to experience a 40% reduction in respiratory diseases compared to the rest of the population, debunking the notion that if you exposure yourself to cold you’ll “catch a cold”.
The study looked at 23 male and 13 female who had been members of a Berlin winter swimming club for more than two years. On average they swam for 5 to 10 minutes on a weekly basis in water between 1 and 5 degrees celsius. Their blood levels of glutathione were compared with that of 28 healthy men and 12 healthy women who had never participated in cold-exposure body hardening therapies such as winter swimming.
Glutathione is our body’s main antioxidant. It protects us from free radicals (reactive oxygen and reactive nitrogen species, ROS and RNS, respectively) that are harmful to our cells. It is produced from three amino acids: glycine, cysteine, and glutamine.
Glutathione reduces oxidative stress produced by these free radicals that occur in cells as a result of their energy production, as well as toxins, pollutants and other stressors. A deficiency of glutathione is associated with an increased risk of cancer, accelerated aging, and other diseases, such as metabolic disease like diabetes and cognitive diseases like Parkinson’s. It decreases as a result of aging, chronic disease, toxin exposure, and chronic stress.
Elevating glutathione status has been shown to improve conditions like insulin resistance, autoimmune diseases, cognitive and mental health conditions, fatty liver and cirrhosis, autism, and respiratory diseases.
It was found that after cold water exposure, blood levels of antioxidants like glutathione decreases, indicating that cold water exposure induces oxidative stress on the body. However, after a period of time, glutathione levels rose higher than that of baseline.
Baseline blood levels of glutathione were higher in cold water swimmers, indicating that their bodies were more efficient at producing glutathione in response to the temporary oxidative stress imposed on them by the cold exposure.
In essence, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”.
This is called hormesis: when temporary stress is imposed on our bodies, we respond with adaptive measures, such as increased glutathione production to combat that stress. However, our bodies are smart. They figure that if we’re exposed to some cold stress, there might be more coming. Therefore, it might be a good idea to invest energy into hardening, preparing for more of that same stress in the future and, in essence, becoming more resilient. And so, when exposed to a stressor, we often produce more antioxidant than is needed to simply overcome that stressor, and this results in an overall net benefit to our health and well-being.
Just like lifting weights makes us stronger for the next time we lift weights, we become stronger and more resilient at our baseline as we prepare for the next hit of cold, heat, exercise, or stress.
The 1998 study also revealed that cold water swimmers had more enzymes that combat free radicals such as superoxide dismutase, glutathione peroxidase, and catalase, meaning that their cells were better prepared to ramp up antioxidant production quickly and neutralize free radicals at a moment’s notice, if needed.
Cold water swimmers also produced four times more norepinephrine after their cold exposure. Norepinephrine is part of our fight or flight response, but is also associated with increased energy, mood, motivation and well-being. Imagine a hit of caffeine–that’s a bit what cold burst can do to you via norepinephrine. Heart race increases, and we’re filled with an excited euphoria.
Norepinephrine is part of the reason why cold therapy has been touted as a remedy for depression. Cold exposure provides a much-needed burst of mobilizing chemicals to kickstart feelings of well-being and motivation for people who are struggling with low mood and arousal.
Cold therapy also increases dopamine by 250%, according to a 2000 study in the European Journal of Applied Physiology. Dopamine gives us the sense of motivation and meaning in pursuing a goal. It fills us with purpose and drive. So many of us are starved of dopamine and therefore so much of our culture involves trying to increase dopamine: scrolling social media, consuming sugar, playing video games, and so on.
The problem with many of these attempts to boost dopamine is that they come with a cost. We get a hit of pleasure from consuming sugar, for example, followed by a dip in our baseline levels of dopamine. Overall, we’re left feeling empty, foggy, purposeless, and addicted. We experience cravings that need to be filled.
Even supplements like Macuna pruriens and l-tyrosine, designed to boost dopamine levels, result in crashes 30 to 45 minutes after they peak.
Cold exposure, however, gives us a hit of dopamine that remains elevated for hours without a resulting crash. This provides an intense boost to mood, motivation, cognitive function, concentration, focus, purpose and drive. Like norepinephrine this can also contribute to cold therapy’s anti-depressive effect.
It seems that if we engage in something hard and uncomfortable, something that requires effort–like cold exposure–our body rewards us with an increase in mood, motivation and drive through the enhancement of dopamine production in our brains.
Winter surfing has been an immense gift to my health and well-being. It’s given me purpose, community, exposure to nature, and a wonderful outlet for body hardening. If I go more than a week without a surf session I start to feel a bit of withdrawal. There is nothing more therapeutic than hours spent checking the forecast, and driving to chase waves in order to end up floating in the middle of a beautiful lake, surrounded by nature and friends.
With regular winter surfing I feel invigorated, energized and fit–the mood-lifting effects of the cold exposure is comparable to nothing else.
This winter my message to everyone is: get outside. Exposure yourself to cold. Expose yourself to nature. Use the elements and the changing seasons as tools to enhance your health.
There are incredible mood-elevating, immune system-boosting and anti-aging benefits to becoming more resilient. While it may be uncomfortable, cold adaptation is a sign of your improved vitality and disease resistance.
Nature’s harshness evolved us. Temperature extremes helped to shape our DNA. Our genes contain codes for amazing mental, emotional, and physical resilience. They are waiting to be turned on at a moment’s notice, if only they’re given a reason.
Cold exposure flips the on-switch to your body’s incredible superpowers. Let’s explore the potential of this beautiful vessel in which we all live.
References:
Šrámek, P., Šimečková, M., Janský, L. et al. Human physiological responses to immersion into water of different temperatures. Eur J Appl Physiol81, 436–442 (2000). https://doi.org/10.1007/s004210050065
W.G. Siems, R. Brenke, O. Sommerburg, T. Grune, Improved antioxidative protection in winter swimmers, QJM: An International Journal of Medicine, Volume 92, Issue 4, April 1999, Pages 193–198, https://doi.org/10.1093/qjmed/92.4.193
It was a crappy week and I was chatting with a friend online. He said something that triggered me… it just hit some sort of nerve. I backed away from my computer, feeling heavy. I went to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of water and collapsed, elbows on the counter, head in my hands, my body shaking and wracking with deep, guttural sobs.
A few seconds later, I’m not sure how long exactly, I stood up. Tears and snot streaming down my face, I wiped them off with a tissue. I felt lighter, clearer. I was still heavy and sad, but there was a part of me that had opened. I went back to my computer and relayed some of this to my friend, “what you said triggered me, but it’s ok, it just hit a personal nerve. I’m ok now though, I know you didn’t mean any harm”. I typed to him.
Joan Rosenberg, PhD in her book 90 Seconds to a Life You Love, would have said that, in that moment, I had been open to feeling the moment-to-moment experience of my emotions and bodily sensations. I felt the waves of emotions run through my body, and let them flow for a total of up to 90 seconds. And, in so welcoming that experience and allowing it to happen rather than blocking it, fighting it, projecting it (onto my friend or others), I was able to release it and let it go.
For many of us, avoidance is our number one strategy when it comes to our emotions. We don’t like to feel uncomfortable. We don’t like unpleasant sensations, thoughts and feelings and, most of all, we don’t like feeling out of control. Emotions can be painful. In order to avoid these unpleasant experiences, we distract ourselves. We try to numb our bodies and minds to prevent these waves of emotion and bodily sensation from welling up inside of us. We cut ourselves off.
The problem, however is that we can’t just cut off one half of our emotional experience. When we cut off from the negative emotions, we dampen the positive ones as well.
This can result in something that Dr. Rosenberg titles, “soulful depression”, the result of being disconnected from your own personal experience, which includes your thoughts, emotions and body sensations.
Soulful depression is characterized by an internal numbness, or a feeling of emptiness. Over time it can transform into isolation, alienation and hopelessness–perhaps true depression.
Anxiety in many ways is a result of cutting ourselves off from emotional experience as well. It is a coping mechanism: a way that we distract ourselves from the unpleasant emotions we try to disconnect from.
When we worry or feel anxious our experience is often very mental. We might articulate that we are worried about a specific outcome. However, it’s not so much the outcome we are worried about but a fear and desire to avoid the unpleasant emotions that might result from the undesired outcome–the thing we are worrying about. In a sense, anxiety is a way that we distract from the experience of our emotions, and transmute them into more superficial thoughts or worries.
When you are feeling anxious, what are you really feeling?
Dr. Rosenberg writes that there are eight unpleasant feelings:
sadness
shame
helplessness
anger
embarrassment
disappointment
frustration
vulnerability
Often when we are feeling anxious we are actually feeling vulnerable, which is an awareness that we can get hurt (and often requires a willingness to put ourselves out there, despite this very real possibility).
When we are able to stay open to, identify and allow these emotions to come through us, Dr. Rosenberg assures us that we will be able to develop confidence, resilience, and a feeling of emotional strength. We will be more likely to speak to our truth, combat procrastination, and bypass negative self-talk.
She writes, “Your sense of feeling capable in the world is directly tied to your ability to experience and move through the eight difficult feelings”.
Like surfing a big wave, when we ride the waves of the eight difficult emotions we realize that we can handle anything, as the rivers of life are more able to flow through us and we feel more present to our experience: both negative and positive.
One of the important skills involved in “riding the waves” of difficult feelings is to learn to tolerate the body sensations that they produce. For many people, these sensations will feel very intense–especially if you haven’t practice turning towards them, but the important thing to remember is that they will eventually subside, in the majority of cases in under 90 seconds.
Therefore, the key is to stay open to the flow of the energy from these emotions and body sensations, breathe through them and watch them crescendo and dissipate.
This idea reminds me of the poem by Rumi, The Guest House:
This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
One of the reasons I was so drawn to Dr. Rosenberg’s book is this idea of the emotional waves lasting no more than 90 seconds. We are so daunted by these waves because they require our surrender. It is very difficult however, if you suffer from anxiety to let go of control. To gives these emotional waves a timeframe can help us stick it out. 90 seconds is the length of a short song! We can tolerate almost anything for 90 seconds. I found this knowledge provided me with a sense of freedom.
The 90 seconds thing comes from Dr. Jill Bolt Taylor who wrote the famous book My Stroke of Insight (watch her amazing Ted Talk by the same name). When an emotion is triggered, she states, chemicals from the brain are released into the bloodstream and surge through the body, causing body sensations.
Much like a wave washing through us, the initial sensation is a rush of the chemicals that flood our tissues, followed by a flush as they leave. The rush can occur as blushing, heat, heaviness, tingling, is over within 90 seconds after which the chemicals have completely been flushed out of the bloodstream.
Dr. Rosenberg created a method she calls the “Rosenberg Reset”, which involves three steps:
Stay aware of your moment-to-moment experience. Fully feel your feelings, thoughts, bodily sensations. Choose to be aware of and not avoid your experience.
Experience and move through the eight difficult feelings when they occur. These are: sadness, shame, helplessness, anger, embarrassment, disappointment, frustration, vulnerability.
Ride one or more 90 second waves of bodily sensations that these emotions produce.
Many therapeutic techniques such as mindfulness, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, somatic therapy, and so on utilize these principles. When we expand our window of tolerance and remain open to our physical and emotional experience we allow energy to move through us more gracefully. We move through our stuckness.
Oftentimes though, we can get stuck underwater, or hung up on the crest of a wave. Rumination and high levels of cortisol, our stress hormone can prolong the waves of unpleasant emotion. We may be more susceptible to this if we have a narrow window of tolerance due to trauma.
However, many of us can get stuck in the mind, and when we ruminate on an emotionally triggering memory over and over again, perhaps in an effort to solve it or to make sense of it, we continue to activate the chemicals in our body that produce the emotional sensation.
Therefore, it’s the mind that can keep us stuck, not the emotions themselves. Harsh self-criticism can also cause feelings to linger.
I have found that stories and memories, grief, terror and rage can become stuck in our bodies. Books like The Body Keeps the Score speak to this–when we block the waves, or when the waves are too big we can build up walls around them. We compartmentalize them, we shut them away and these little 90 second waves start to build up, creating energetic and emotional blockages.
In Vipassana they were referred to as sankharas, heaps of clinging from mental activity and formations that eventually solidify and get lodged in the physical body, but can be transformed and healed.
Perhaps this is why a lot of trauma work involves large emotional purges. Breathwork, plant medicines such as Ayahuasca, and other energetic healing modalities often encourage a type of purging to clear this “sludge” that tends to accumulate in our bodies.
My friend was commenting on the idea that her daughter, about two years old, rarely gets sick. “She’ll have random vomiting spells,” my friend remarked, “and then, when she’s finished, she recovers and plays again”.
“It reminds me of a mini Ayahuasca ceremony”, I remarked, jokingly, “maybe babies are always in some sort of Ayahuasca ceremony.”
This ability to cry, to purge, to excrete from the body is likely key to emotional healing. I was listening to a guest on the Aubrey Marcus podcast, Blu, describe this: when a story gets stuck in a person it often requires love and a permission to move it, so that it may be purged and released.
Fevers, food poisoning, deep fitful spells of sobbing may all be important for clearing up the backlog of old emotional baggage and sludge so that we can free up our bodies to ride these 90 second emotional waves in our moment-to-moment experience.
Grief is one of these primary sources of sludge in my opinion. Perhaps because we live in a culture that doesn’t quite know how to handle grief–that time-stamps it, limits it, compartmentalizes it, commercializes it, and medicates it–many of us suffer from an accumulation of suppressed grief sankharas that has become lodged in our bodies.
Frances Weller puts it this way,
“Depression isn’t depression, it’s oppression–the accumulated weight of decades of untouched losses that have turned into sediment, an oppressive weight on the soul. Processing loss is how the majority of therapies work, by touching sorrow upon sorry that was never honoured or given it’s rightful attention.”
Like a suppressed bowel movement, feelings can be covered up, distracted from. However, when we start to turn our attention to them we might find ourselves running to the nearest restroom. Perhaps in these moments it’s important to get in touch with someone to work with, a shaman of sorts, or a spiritual doula, someone who can help you process these large surges of energy that your body is asking you to purge.
However, it is possible to set our dial to physiological neutral to, with courage turn towards our experience, our emotions and body sensations. And to know that we can surf them, and even if we wipe out from time to time, we might end up coming out the other side, kicking out, as Rumi says, “laughing”.
The only way out is through.
As Jon Kabat Zinn says, “you can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf”.
Whenever I sit with a new patient for an initial intake, I ask about cravings.
From my many conversations about food, appetite and cravings, the most common responses are cravings for salt, or sugar, with many people falling on one end of the preference than the other: “I’m a salt craver” or “I’ve got a sweet tooth”.
However, cravings are so much more than that.
I believe that they are a beautifully intricate process, in which our body is trying to speak to us about what it needs.
Our bodies have developed taste receptors to detect quality nutrients from the environment. While these days sugar is abundant wherever you turn, during our hunter-gatherer times, it was a relatively scarce and highly sought after taste–the taste of ripe fruit, rich with nutrients, the taste of quality calories from carbohydrates, which may have been scarce in times of food shortage or famine.
Salt or “savoury” or umami cravings, often represent a need for more protein. Unfortunately, many of my patients who crave salt (and often calories) find themselves the bottom of a bag of chips, rather than grilling up a chicken breast.
Our modern environment doesn’t necessarily set us up to adequately translate and respond properly to certain cravings. Salted chips were probably not a thing in a natural environment and the only way to satisfy a salt and savoury craving would have been through hunting, consuming meat, or eggs and poultry.
When I was travelling in Colombia I was obsessed with broccoli–it was like I couldn’t get enough of it.
The same thing happened on a month-long trip to Brazil in 2019. Broccoli is rich in vitamin C, sulphur, and certain amino acids. It’s also a decent source of calcium. I’m not sure what nutrient I may have been lacking on my travels, but it’s possible that those cravings meant something for my body. And so I honoured them–I sought out broccoli like it was a magic elixir of health and ate as much of it as I could.
After developing significant iron deficiency after spending a few years as a vegetarian, I became suddenly attracted by the smell of roasting chicken from a local Korean restaurant I was passing by while walking the streets of Toronto.
The wafting smell of roasting poultry was majestic and impossible to ignore. It didn’t smell like sin, or temptation–my body betraying my moral sensibilities or whatever else we often accuse our cravings of—it smelt… like health.
There was no doubt in my mind as the delicious fumes touched my nostrils that I needed to honour my body and start eating meat again. I did and my health and nutrient status has never been better.
Patients will report craving carbs and chocolate the week before their period. The eb and flow of estrogen can affect serotonin levels. A large dose of carbs allows tryptophan, the amino acid that forms the backbone of serotonin, to freely enter the brain. This explains the effect “comfort foods” like starchy warm bread and pasta have on us, creating that warm, after-Thanksgiving dinner glow.
Chocolate is rich in magnesium, a nutrient in which many of us are deficient, that is in higher demand throughout the luteal phase of our cycle, or our premenstrual week.
Cravings are not just nagging, annoying vices, thrust in the path to greater health and iron discipline. They’re complex, intuitive and beautiful. They may be important landmarks on the path to true health and wellness.
Disciplines like Intuitive Eating and Mindful Eating have based themselves on the idea that our bodies hold intuitive wisdom and our tastes, cravings and appetites may be essential for guiding us on a road to health. Through removing restriction and paying more attention to the experience of food, we may be better guided to choose what foods are right for us.
The book The Dorito Effect outlines how our taste cues have been hijacked by Big Food. Like having a sham translator, processed foods stand between essential nutrients and the signals our bodies use to guide us to them. A craving for sweet that might have led you to ripe fruit, now leads you to a bag of nutrient-devoid candy that actually robs you of magnesium, and other nutrients in order to process the chemicals. A craving for salt and umami, or hunger for calories leads you to polish off a bag of chips, which are protein-devoid and laden with inflammatory fats, and only trigger more cravings, and shame.
It’s no wonder that we don’t trust our cravings– we live in a world that exploits them at every turn.
Clara Davis in 1939 was curious about the instintual nature of human cravings and devised a study that was published in the Canadian Medical Assoication Journal (CMAJ). The study was called Self-Selection of Diets by Young Children.
Clara gathered together 15 orphaned infants between 6 to 11 months of age who were weaning from breast-feeding and ready to receive solid food for the first time. These infants, before the study had never tried solid food or supplements. They were studied ongoing for a period of 6 years, with the main study process was conducted over a period of months.
The babies were sat at a table with a selection of simple, whole foods–33 to be exact. The foods contained no added sugars or salt. They were minimally cooked. Not all 33 were presented to each baby at each meal, however the babies were offered an opportunity to try everything.
The foods they were offered were water, sweet milk, sour (lactic) milk, sea salt, apples, bananas, orange juice, pineapple, peaches, tomatoes, beets, carrots, peas, turnips, cauliflower, cabbage, spinach, potato, lettuce, oatmeal, wheat, corn meal, barley, Ry-krisp (a kind of cereal), beef, lamb, bone marrow, bone jelly, chicken, sweetbreads, brains, liver, kidneys, eggs, and fish (haddock).
The nurses who were involved in running the study were instructed to sit in front of the infants with a spoon and wait for them to point at foods that they wanted. The nurses were not to comment on the choices or foods in any way, but wordlessly comply with the infants’ wishes and offer them a spoonful of the chosen foodstuff.
Throughout the study Davis noted that all the infants had hearty appetites and enjoyed eating.
At first, the babies showed no instinct for food choices, selecting things at random, and exploring the various foods presented to them. All of them tried everything at least once (two babies never tried lettuce and one never explored spinach). The most variety of food choices occurred during the first two weeks of the study when they were presumably in their experimentation phase.
Their tastes also changed from time to time, perhaps reflecting some hidden, internal mechanism, growth spurt or nutritional need. Sometimes a child would have orange juice and liver for breakfast (liver is a source of iron, and vitamin C from the orange juice aids in its absorption), and dinner could be something like eggs, bananas, and milk.
Many infants began the study in a state of malnourishment. Four were underweight and five suffered from Rickets a condition caused by extremely low vitamin D. One of the babies with severe Rickets was offered cod liver oil in addition to the other food options. Cod liver oil is a rich source of vitamin D.
The infant selected cod liver oil often for a while, after which his vitamin D, phosphorus and calcium blood levels all returned to normal range, and x-rays showed that his Ricket’s healed.
It is often thought by parents that children, if left to their own devices will eat themselves nutrient-deficient. While that may be true in todays’ landscape of processed frankenfoods, the infants in Davis’ study consumed a diet that was balanced and high in variety. They got 17% of their calories from protein, 35% from fat and 48% from carbohydrates and intake depended on their activity levels.
During the 6 years in which the infants’ eating habits were under observation, they rarely suffered from health issues. They had no digestive issues, like constipation. If they came down with a cold it would last no more than 3 days before they were fully recovered.
In the 6 years, they became ill with a fever only once, an outbreak that affected all of the infants in the orphanage. The researchers noticed their appetites change in response to the illness.
During the initial stages of the fever, they had lower appetites. And, once the fevers began to resolve, their appetites came back with a vengeance. They ate voraciously, and it was interesting that most of them showed an increased preference for raw carrots, beef and beets–which may indicate a need for vitamin A, iron and protein, which are needed for immune system function and recovery.
The habits of the infants to crave and select medicinal foods during times of fever and nutrient deficiency is such compelling evidence of Clara Davis’ craving wisdom hypothesis—were their bodies telling them what they needed to heal?
The self-selected, whole foods diets seems to have a positive impact on the mood and behaviours of the babies, all of whom were living full-time at the orphanage.
A psychiatrist, Dr. Joseph Brennemann wrote an article on them entitled “Psychologic Aspects of Nutrition” in the Journal of Pediatrics on their mood, behaviour and affect, “I saw them on a number of occasions and they were the finest group of specimens from the physical and behaviour standpoint that I have even seen in children of that age.”
In our world we often try to mentalize our food choices: going vegan or low-fat, counting calories, or reducing carbs. We time our eating windows, fast, or try to exert discipline and will over our bodies’ inherent desires.
So often my patients need to be coached through food eliminations, or given meal plans and templates. The art of listening to the body: properly identifying hunger, thirst, fatigue, inflammation, and even emotions like boredom, anxiety, sadness, anger, and hurt, can be a long process.
And yet, I wonder if we clear our palates and offer them a variety of whole, unprocessed, fresh foods, if our bodies will settle into their own grooves–perhaps our health will optimize, our bodies will be able to more readily communicate what they need, our taste receptors and cravings will adjust, and our cravings and appetite will serve the purpose they were meant to–to tell us what we need more of and what need less of or not at all.
I wonder if we listen, what our bodies will tell us.
I wonder if we let them, if our bodies will exhibit the pure instinctual wisdom of nature and the quest for harmony and homeostasis that lies at the heart of our natural world.
About a month ago I fractured my right 5th metatarsal (an avulsion fracture, aka “The Dancer’s Fracture” or a “Pseudo-Jones Fracture”).
As soon as I laid eyes on the x-ray and the ER doctor declared, “Ms. Marcheggiani,” (actually, it’s doctor, but ok) “you broke your foot!” things changed.
I have never broken anything before, but if you have you know what it’s like. In a matter of seconds I couldn’t drive. I could barely put weight on it. I was given an Aircast boot to hobble around in, and told to ice and use anti-inflammatories sparingly. My activities: surfing, skateboarding, yoga, even my daily walks, came to a startling halt.
I spent the first few days on the couch, my foot alternating between being elevated in the boot and immersed in an ice bath. I took a tincture with herbs like Solomon’s Seal, mullein, comfrey, and boneset to help heal the bone faster. I was adding about 6 tbs of collagen to oats in the morning. I was taking a bone supplement with microcrystalline hydroxyapatite, pellets of homeopathic symphytum, zinc, and vitamin D.
We call this “treatment stacking”: throwing everything but the kitchen sink at something to give the body as many resources as possible that it may use to heal.
My brother’s wedding came and went. I was the emcee, and the best man. I bedazzled my boot and hobbled around during set-up, photos, presentations, and even tried shaking and shimmying, one-legged on the dance floor. The next few days I sat on the couch with my leg up.
I watched the Olympics and skateboarding videos. I read The Master and the Margarita and Infinite Jest. I got back into painting and created some pen drawings, trying to keep my mind busy.
I slept long hours–an amount that I would have previously assumed to be incapable. The sleep felt necessary and healing. I was taking melatonin to deepen it further.
I closed down social media apps on my phone to deal with the immense FOMO and stop mindlessly scrolling. I journaled instead, turning my focus from the outside world to my inner one.
It was a painful process, and not necessarily physically.
I was confined to my immediate surroundings–not able to walk far or drive. I was at the mercy of friends and family to help me grocery shop. The last year and a half has made many of us grow accustomed to social isolation and a lot of my social routines from years prior had fallen by the wayside.
My world, like the worlds of many, had gotten smaller over the last 18 months. With a broken foot, my world shrunk even further.
The loneliness was excruciating.
It would come in waves.
One moment I would relish the time spent idle and unproductive. The next I would be left stranded by my dopamine receptors, aimless, sobbing, grieving something… anything… from my previous life. And perhaps not just the life I had enjoyed pre-broken foot, but maybe a life before society had “broken”, or even before my heart had.
I thought I would be more mentally productive and buckle down on work projects but it became painfully obvious that my mental health and general productivity are tightly linked to my activity levels. And so I spent a lot of the weeks letting my bone heal in a state of waiting energy.
My best friend left me a voicemail that said, “Yes… you’re in that waiting energy. But, you know, something will come out of it. Don’t be hard on yourself. Try to enjoy things… watch George Carlin…”
During the moments where I feel completely useless and unproductive, waiting for life to begin, I was reminded of this quote by Cheryl Strayed. This quote speaks to me through the blurry, grey haze of boredom and the existential urgency of wasting time.
It says,
“The useless days will add up to something. The shitty waitressing jobs. The hours writing in your journal. The long meandering walks. The hours reading poetry and story collections and novels and dead people’s diaries and wondering about sex and God and whether you should shave under your arms or not. These things are your becoming.”
These things are your becoming.
Something will come out of it.
When I did a 10-Day Vipassana (silent meditation) retreat in the summer of 2018, I learned about pain.
It was Day 3 or 4 and we had been instructed to sit for an entire hour without moving. The pain was excruciating. The resistance was intense. I was at war with myself and then, when the gong went off and there was nothing to push against, I noticed a complete relief of tension. I was fine.
The next time I sat to meditate (another hour after a 10 minute break), I observed the resistance and released it. It’s hard to describe exactly what I did. It was something like, letting the sensations of pain flow through me like leaves on a river, rather than trying to cup my hands around them, or understand or making meaning out of them.
The sensations ebbed and flowed. Some might have been called “unpleasant” but I wasn’t in a space to judge them while I was just a casual observer, watching them flow by. They just were.
And when I have intense feelings of loneliness, boredom or heart-break I try to remember the experience I had with pain and discomfort on my meditation cushion. I try to allow them.
“This too shall pass”.
When I have a craving to jump off my couch and surf, or an intense restlessness in the rest of my body, the parts that aren’t broken, I try to let those sensations move through me.
I notice how my foot feels. How while apparently still, beneath my external flesh my body is busy: it’s in a process. It’s becoming something different than it was before. It’s becoming more than a foot that is unbroken. It’s becoming callused and perhaps stronger.
Maybe my spirit is in such a process as well.
The antidote to boredom and loneliness very often is a process of letting them move through, of observing the sensations and stepped back, out of the river to watch them flow by. A patience. Letting go.
I can’t surf today. But, it is the nature of waves that there will always be more.
Pima Chodron in her book When Things Fall Apart also references physical pain and restless in meditation while speaking of loneliness.
She writes,
“Usually we regard loneliness as the enemy. Heartache is not something we choose to invite in. It’s restless and pregnant and hot with desire to escape and find something or someone to keep us company. When we can rest in the middle, we begin to have a nonthreatening relationship with loneliness, a relaxing and cooling loneliness that completely turns our usual fearful patterns upside down.”
She continues,
“When you wake up in the morning and out of nowhere comes the heartache of alienation and loneliness, could you use that as a golden opportunity? Rather than persecuting yourself or feeling that something terribly wrong is happening, right there in the moment of sadness and longing, could you relax and touch the limitless space of the human heart?
“The next time you get a chance, experiment with this.”
I talk about how to manage stress and promote mental health and emotional wellness through assessing balance in the key areas of your life that promote a healthy mind and body.
Hello, everybody, my name is Dr. Talia Marcheggiani. I’m a mental health and hormone expert.
Stress is a big reason why a lot of people come to see me, for support in their lifestyle and optimization of their health, especially their mood and mental health.
And, one of the things that I’ve come to understand in working with people one on one is that stress in life is an inevitability, especially in our society.
Work is just one aspect of the stress that influences our lives, but things like loss of loved ones, and ending of relationships, pressure from work, monetary struggles. These things in society are inevitabilities. So, we’re sooner or later going to be faced with major stressors in our lives regardless of how well our life is happening right now.
One of the big things in terms of working with people is helping with their resilience to stress. That means building up resources. So, before I meet with a patient I have them fill out an online intake form. And this is sent to their email and one of the—the intake form goes over what their concerns are, what they’re coming in for, it goes through all the areas of their health, their physical health and mental health and one aspect as well, in the chart is something called The Wheel of Balance. And, what the Wheel of Balance does is, it looks at all the major pillars that make up somebody’s life. It asks the potential patient or the new patient, to assess, to rate on a scale of 1 to 10 how satisfied they are with that area of their life.
So, for example, one of the areas is health and so on a scale of 1 to 10 how you feel that your health is managed? How satisfied are you with your level of health? Are you in chronic pain? Do you feel unwell generally? Or do you feel like health is pretty well managed, despite the fact that you’re coming in with a health concern?
Another area is relationships. So, personal relationships. So, some people don’t have a significant other and, if that’s so, how do you feel about that? Or, if you do have a significant other, how satisfying is that relationship? How well do you feel that relationship supports you in your life?
There’s several reasons for this Wheel of Balance. One is to just get a general understanding of the life of the person I’m going to be working with, what the broad picture is in terms of their life.
And another reason is that we know a lot of these factors such as relationships, and health and career, and money and whether you have hobbies, whether you have something that fills you, something that gives you a sense of purpose, we know that these things are determinants of health. So, your socioeconomic status is one of these factors that determines your longevity or your resilience against disease, especially your resilience against stress. If I have somebody coming in with depression and anxiety who’s recently been laid off, no amount of herbs—well, the herbs can buffer the stress response and relax the physical body so that somebody can look for work, but on the high priority list is helping them find a job again, because no matter how calm you’re feeling physically, or much meditation you’re doing, the fact that you don’t have a way to pay your bills is a major stressor that won’t go away until it’s dealt with.
And, another reason as well for doing this Wheel of Balance, if we’re assessing this holistic scope of what someone’s life is, is the fact that these pillars, when they’re strengthened, they provide the basis for the resilience against onslaughts of stress that come in.
So, many of the people that come in and see me who are dealing with mental health issues, they’re often struggling with an onslaught of stress that’s hit them. So it could be that they’ve recently been laid or separated from a partner in a romantic relationship, or it could be a great loss or trauma or somethings are surfacing.
Organizing these pillars of resilience is really effective for helping somebody deal with the stress and survive a new wave of stress.
In naturopathic school we learned about something called the Stress Wall, so it’s sort of a similar idea. You’re building up these resilience factors, you’re strengthening relationships, you’re dedicating time and energy to creating a career that you love, you’re arming yourself with hobbies and interests and purpose and passion and, therefore, when a stress wave hits you, you’re able to withstand it, or you’re able to recover more quickly. It doesn’t throw you, it doesn’t send you into chaos, physically, mentally and emotionally.
And sometimes these waves of stress they test our stress wall, so sometimes people are doing all right and then a really stressful time at work will show them how well their stress wall’s been built.
So one thing you can do, right now, having said all this, is do a Wheel of Balance with me. So, all you need is a piece of paper, and you’re just going to draw a circle on it. And you’re going to divide the circle up into 8 sections. So, divide it in half, then in quarters, then divide those quarters into halves so that you have 8 sections on your wheel.
And then you’re going to label each pie slice with a title. So, the first one is career. The second one, money, because those are two separate things. Our career is not always tied to our money. Sometimes satisfaction with a career doesn’t necessarily mean monetary satisfaction. So we separate those two things, although they can be linked. The third is health. The fourth is relationships, and this is romantic relationships or significant other.
The fifth is family and friends, supporting relationships. If you don’t have a significant other, you can also rate your satisfaction with the fact that you don’t have a significant other, so if you’re single and feeling pretty good about it, pretty happy with your independence, or are you in the search of looking for a significant other, or are you recently single and upset about that. So this is something where you can evaluate your satisfaction because it is a piece of the puzzle and piece of the Wheel of Balance in terms of resilience, because one of the biggest sources of stress is from romantic partnership or lack thereof.
So the sixth pie slice is fun and hobbies. This is something meaningful that you pursue outside of your work, whether you have one or more things. In that section is sort of what you do to destress, so do you come home and flip on the TV and is that a fulfilling and stress-reducing activity for you? It can be for a lot of people, but bringing awareness and consciousness to that is very helpful.
The seventh is purpose and growth. So, are you everyday creating meaning in your life? Is there a clear meaning for your life and are you fulfilling that meaning and purpose? Do you feel like you’re growing and learning every day? That’s really important for a lot of people and I often find that people mark that pretty low especially when they’re dealing with a mental health condition or a high amount of stress in their lives.
And then the final thing is your physical environment. Physical environment is, are you happy with where you’re living? So how your living arrangement is, physically. Is it a comfortable space to live in? Do you like how it’s decorated? Do you like where you’re living? What city you’re in? What part of the city you’re in? Are you exposed to nature on a regular basis and, if not or if so, how important is that to you? So you’re evaluating what the state is of the physical surroundings that you’re in. So that’s why we clean our houses or why we care about where we’re living because a cluttered environment does affect our internal and mental state.
So, again, those categories are career, money, health, relationship, family and friends, fun and hobbies, purpose and growth, and physical environment. So, when you’re finished you’ll have a chart that looks like this. So it’s got eight different slices with different labels. And, on your own I want you to fill in the pie according to your level of satisfaction, so if you’re 100% satisfied in the area of your career then you colour in the entire pie slice. If you’re only 50% satisfied or one quarter than you fill the corresponding amount out. Then you look at the areas you’re not as satisfied in and the areas you might be over-compensating in. So you might be really dedicated to maintaining a healthy lifestyle but may be sacrificing in the area of fun and haven’t really invested in making sure you’re creating fun activities.
You also might not want these categories. There might be another category that’s more important to you. If you don’t care about one of these categories it might mean that you’re satisfied with it, or you don’t feel that it brings meaning to your life, and that’s totally cool.
But, it’s sort of an idea of these areas that we build our lives around. And so what I do with people, because a lot of the time when people are feeling a lot of stress, or have a mental/emotional issue that they’re coming in with, depression or anxiety, neurosis or anything like that, a lot of the time they’re missing a few areas, or their Wheel of Balance is skewed in one area or it’s just generally weak all over. And so what we have to do—that means these people are very susceptible and vulnerable and the first thing to do, instead of working on diet or giving herbs and that kind of thing, is to strengthen some of those areas to create a more robust Wheel of Balance. And so what we do is, if there’s an area that you’re weak in, is creating one concrete thing you can do, more or less immediately, so let’s say within the week, that would strengthen and kind of balance out your Wheel of Balance.
And so, an area that is often lacking for most adults and busy people is fun, so if you put 25% of satisfaction in the area of fun, then coming up with a strategy, one thing you can do this week that would increase your satisfaction, even a little bit, and start to build up that pie slice, in the Wheel of Balance. So, thinking of something you would do that you would classify as fun. In the area of family and friends, how can I reach out to somebody, or strengthen an existing friendship or look for a way that I could put myself in a position to meet new people. So we start working on these areas. So once you’ve developed resilience and strength, we’re better able to weather the new waves of stress that hit us because they will, inevitably. Some of us are blessed to not have as many stress waves, but eventually there is something that will affect us and will affect our state of balance and our mental health so the stronger our pillars of resistance and the more robust our Wheel of Balance is, the better able we are to weather these storms and maintain our mental and emotional health and our physical health, because we know they’re all connected.
My name is Dr. Talia Marcheggiani, thanks for listening and if you want to contact me, my email is connect@taliand.com. I practice in Bloor West Village in Toronto.
Someone, I think it was Eckhart Tolle, once said that when it comes to mental illness, anxiety is about worry for the future, while depression is concerned with regret for the past. While, I’m not entirely (or even nearly) convinced that this is true, there is little doubt that those with both depression and anxiety can get caught in the paralysis of going over past events and regrets in their minds. Therefore, healing regret becomes important for reframing our past experiences and present identity and improving mood and self-esteem.
Regret is a sticky emotion. It reminds us of who we once were. It’s the cold hand on the shoulder and the voice that whispers “remember…” in our ear when we’re getting a little too confident, when we’re actually feeling happy with who we are now.
My patients will often tell me that when they find themselves in a spiral of low mood, their minds are often playing and replaying past events over and over. They mull over painful memories until they are distorted, painting themselves as the villain the more they rewind and press play. Remembering in this way smears grey over their entire sense of self, and discolours the possibilities they see for themselves in the future and, worse, their abilities to take meaningful action in the present. It leads to deep feelings of self-hate and worthlessness. It causes feelings of hopelessness. And so I tell them this:
Regret, while painful, is not always bad. It is a reflection, a comparison between two people: the person you are now and the person you used to be. When this comparison is particularly vast, when the you you used to be is particularly painful to remember, then know this; you have changed. Regret comes with looking back with pain, wishing we’d taken a different course of action than the ones taken. However, when we flip this concept over and examine its shinier underbelly, we realize that in order to feel regretful about past events we are acknowledging that we (present we) would not have performed the same action or made the same choice now. The flip side is not that we’re bad, it’s a reflection of our goodness. We have learned and evolved. We’re different.
Looking back is different from looking forward. Our lessons are what shape us. The fact that we regret is proof that we learn, we grow and we change into better, preferred versions of ourselves. If we sit in the experience of regret, we can feel proud that, if faced with the same situation today, we’d be better. Regret doesn’t mean that we are bad people, it’s proof that we’re good people. In order to regret the past we’ve had to have changed.
To transform mulling over painful life choices and past actions, I recommend a writing exercise, inspired by Narrative Therapy. In every story of regret and “badness” there is also a story of values, skills, preferred identity and goodness. The next time you find yourself cycling through feelings of regret grab a pen and paper and answer the following questions:
1) What happened? What were the events that transpired? What did you do? What did other people in the story do? What were the events leading up to the action you and others took? What was the context surrounding you at the time? What influenced your decision to act as you did?
2) Looking back, what would you have done differently? What parts are particularly painful to remember? What actions or events do you regret?
3) What might these regrets say about you now? What might it say about you to know that you would have acted differently if you were faced with the same situation? What values do you embody that enable you to recognize that what you did in the past was regretful for you?
4) Looking at these values, how have you shown you have this value in the past in other situations? Do you have a particular story you remember?
5) How has that value or skill made an impact on the lives of others? In the story that you remembered, what might the actions you took in #4 have meant to the people around you?
6) How do you embody this value in the present? Where does it show up in the actions you take today? How might you embody this value in the future? What actions might you take while remembering this value? What does remembering this value and the story from #4 make possible for the future?
Going through this writing exercise can help us look back with more compassion for the person we were, who was growing into the person we are now. It might make possible ways that we can rectify anyone or anything was impacted in the past, if it means an apology, paying forward a good act, taking different steps in a similar present situation or even moving on and letting go of our tendency to hold onto the memory.
With 18% of the population suffering, anxiety is the most common mental health condition in North America. Through clinical practice, I’ve quickly come to learn that “anxiety” is a term that means many different things to different people. Its symptoms can range from a mild sense of unease to full-blown panic attacks and the burdensome weight of impending doom. Anxiety disorders are quite diverse. They include, according to the DSM-IV, specific phobias, generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), social anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and even mixed anxiety and depression. Oftentimes the symptoms become crippling; they prevent the patients I see from living their optimal, authentic lives, instead living in a state of fear and self-loathing.
Symptoms
The symptoms of anxiety are holistic. They range from mental symptoms: excessive worry, insomnia, nervousness and anticipation, to name a few, to genitourinary symptoms like frequent urination, and gastrointestinal symptoms. There is a strong connection between anxiety and mental stress and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), an elusive condition of the gut that results in unpredictable symptoms like bloating, diarrhea, constipation and stomach pain, which is often debilitating for those who suffer from it and very difficult to effectively treat. Other symptoms of anxiety include excessive sweating, muscle tension, rapid heart rate, changes in vision, hot and cold flushes and can be associated with suicidal ideation, self-harm and substance abuse disorders, when anxiety becomes severe.
Conventional Treatment
Unfortunately the conventional treatment for anxiety is limited. The first-line treatment is pharmaceutical and involves using a medication like citalopram, a selective-serotonin re-uptake inhibitor (SSRI), the same medication used to treat mild-moderate depression. This medication is prescribed based on the theory that anxiety is a extraverted version of depression, and that both involve disturbances in the production and signalling of serotonin, the “happy hormone”, in the brain. Benzodiazepines are another line of drugs used to treat anxiety symptoms, as they increase brain GABA levels, a calming brain chemical. However, “benzos” are best prescribed only in the short term (2-4 weeks) to manage serious symptoms. They are addictive in the long-term and can have serious side effects, such as being overly sedating, and depressing breathing, especially when mixed with other sedatives, such as alcohol.
Naturopathic Approach
When I first meet a patient who is suffering with anxiety, I begin by taking a complete case. I have never met two patients who have had identical anxiety symptoms—no two cases of anxiety are alike and therefore, no two cases should be approached in the same way. Therefore, it is important for me to get a complete case history, with details of how anxiety manifests in my patients’ lives: how it affects them, where it might have come from and what specific symptoms are faced on a daily basis. I also inquire about hormonal systems, digestive symptoms, sleep, diet and past medical history. It is important for me to treat the person, not the condition. This means that my patients and I spend time developing a relationship. I make an effort to get to know them during the first few visits, thereby getting to know how their condition uniquely occurs for them.
A large portion of the naturopathic diagnostic process is identifying the cause of anxiety. While conventional medicine points to dysfunctions in the brain, naturopathic medicine approaches anxiety holistically. We understand that because anxiety can affect nearly every body system, it can also manifest as a result of imbalances in a number of organ systems. In the first few visits, we spend time analyzing the web of our patients’ symptoms in order to untangle the clues that might lead us to the root cause.
The Root Causes of Anxiety
A holistic approach to anxiety aims to uncover the root cause of symptoms by investigating imbalances in a variety of body systems. In the body there is a balance between the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) and the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest). When one system is turned on, the other is turned off. A healthy body can oscillate between the two states easily, activating the fight and flight response during times of stress and activating the rest and digest response the rest of the time. Anxiety is present in the fight or flight, sympathetic nervous system state.
Cause: Stress
More than half of North American adults are experiencing some sort of mental, emotional or physical stress. Chronic stress relies on production of the hormone cortisol, which on its own can disrupt brain levels of happy hormones, like serotonin and dopamine. Chronic stress can also lead to burnout, or adrenal fatigue, which results in an inability of the body to respond to stress in a healthy manner. Instead of producing cortisol, the adrenal glands rely on epinephrine and norepinephrine (adrenaline and noradrenaline) to confront stressful situations. These hormones result in symptoms of anxiety like racing heart-rate, rapid respiration, muscle tension, mental worry, dry mouth and sweating palms. Being stuck in the fight or flight state, can cause anxiety or worsen existing symptoms.
2. Cause: Malnutrition and Hypoglycaemia
Protein, vitamins and minerals are the building blocks our bodies need to perform its millions of chemical reactions. Trying to heal anxiety without the proper ingredients for health is like trying to build a house without bricks, cement or nails. Neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine, and hormones like cortisol require the amino acids (protein) tryptophan and tyrosine for their synthesis, respectively. They also require cofactors, or “builders”, to make neurotransmitters, which include zinc, b-vitamins, magnesium and iron. Stress, because of it’s demands on cortisol production, can deplete these precious ingredients, increasing our dietary requirements. Decreasing vitamin and mineral content in food due to poor quality food production also means we’re not getting enough of these key nutrients and supplementation might be necessary to ensure our body is running optimally.
In addition, rising and falling blood sugar levels from a high-carb diet can cause hypoglycaemia. Hypoglycaemic symptoms can mimic anxiety symptoms, such as dizziness, racing heart, irritability, sweating and fatigue.
Iron deficiency is also a common finding in North Americans, especially menstruating women or vegetarians. Since iron is responsible for carrying oxygen in the blood, a decrease in oxygen carrying capacity results in rapid heart-rate and increased breathing rate, which can also be confused for symptoms of anxiety or panic attacks.
3. Cause: Digestive Issues
Although serotonin, the happy hormone, is primarily active in the brain, studies show that up to 90% of it is made in the intestinal tract. Therefore, a disruption in the health of digestive cells or the bacteria that coats the gut, can result in a disruption in mood as well as digestive symptoms like IBS. 40-60% of people have some sort of digestive issue in North America and there is a close connection between digestive issues and mood, termed the “gut-brain connection”.
Food sensitivities and issues with the health and integrity of intestinal cells can lead to wide-spread inflammation in the body, affecting the nervous system. Scientists have found that low levels of inflammation in the brain and an overactive immune system can contribute to depression and other mental health conditions as well as the breakdown of brain function, contributing to memory loss, headaches and difficulty concentrating and retaining information.
Furthermore, an inability to break down and absorb protein and micronutrients results in an inability for the body to make neurotransmitters like serotonin, which require protein and various vitamins and minerals for its production.
4. Cause: Hormonal Imbalance
Because of the high exposure to xeno-estrogens, or toxic estrogens, many women in North America suffer from a phenomenon called “estrogen dominance”, where there is either too much estrogen in the body or not enough progesterone to provide hormonal balance. Symptoms of estrogen dominance include, weight, gain, painful and heavy periods, irregular periods, fibroids, acne, PMS, infertility and an increased incidence of female cancers, such as breast and ovarian cancer. Estrogen and progesterone, in addition to being female hormones that control secondary sex characteristics like breast and hip development and fertility, also exert effects on the brain. Estrogen can cause irritability and anxiety symptoms, while progesterone has a stress-relieving and calming effect. Estrogen dominance, when not controlled, can worsen existing anxiety or be the cause.
5. Cause: Core Beliefs and Mental Schemas
Our brains are wired to retain the lessons we learn, especially if these lessons have been experienced alongside strong emotions, such as trauma. These emotional memories are often implicit and non-verbal, located in lower brain centres, below the level of our conscious thoughts. Once the memories are laid down, they can last a lifetime, influencing our thoughts, emotions and behavioural reactions to present day triggers. Anxiety and other mental health conditions can often be symptoms of these emotional memories, also called “core beliefs” or “mental schemas”. These beliefs dictate to us implicitly how the world works and, if left unexamined, can limit what is possible for us in our lives. When these beliefs get triggered, anxiety symptoms can result. Getting to the core of the symptoms and making the implicit memories verbal is the key to unlocking hidden psychological causes of mood disorders.
Holistic Solutions for Anxiety
Healing anxiety first involves identifying the specific symptoms that my patients present with and looking for potential causes among the common causes outlined above. In addition to a thorough history, I may order blood work to check the B12 and iron status of my patients. I may order a food sensitivity test or check for hormone levels like progesterone, estrogen and cortisol in the saliva and blood, depending on the symptoms a patient presents with.
When I work with patients, we often work together to develop a comprehensive strategy for coping with stress. Oftentimes this involves looking for ways to decrease stress in their lives, such as cutting back on work hours and setting healthy boundaries. Other times it involves looking for activities to incorporate into their lifestyles to manage stress, such as going for long walks (walking slowly for 1 hour can lower cortisol levels and help manage stress), engaging in meditation, yoga, nature exposure, journalling and other activities that have been proven to lower stress hormones.
Creating a nutritional plan is also important for managing anxiety. I work with the place my patients are at, rather than pushing a full dietary overhaul. Making minor adjustments to diet, such as adding more protein, especially in the morning, more fruits and vegetables and less refined carbs and sugars, can do wonders for decreasing anxiety symptoms. Reducing caffeine and alcohol consumption can also greatly benefit symptoms.
Depending on the specific symptoms and lifestyle of my patients, I might recommend nutritional supplementation to improve neurotransmitter synthesis. I also prescribe supplements to help my patients’ bodies through times of stress, depending on their stress levels and other symptoms they present with. Keeping supplements to a few key nutrients that treat the root cause of symptoms is preferable to taking handfuls of pills every day.
Improving gut health is important. This means supplementing with a good quality probiotic, identifying and removing food sensitivities, and eating a diet that is low in inflammatory fats and high in health-promoting omega 3 fatty acids. A digestive aid such as digestive enzymes or herbal bitters can also help with the body’s ability to absorb valuable nutrients from a healthy diet.
Balancing hormones by supporting liver function, adjusting birth control brand and dosage, and minimizing exposure to hormonal toxins such as BPA, fragrances or phthalates can help treat symptoms of estrogen dominance, if present.
Finally, counselling to identify core beliefs can also be beneficial for eradicating emotional memories that are no longer beneficial to patients and that can be contributing negatively to symptoms of anxiety and mood, is important. CBT, narrative therapy, mindfulness training and Coherence therapy are all processes through which patients can begin to identify and challenge the core beliefs that may be contributing to or causing their anxious symptoms.
For more information on a naturopathic approach to your anxiety, visit my contact page.
When a successful person is asked to share the secrets of his or her success, the unanimous response is that success requires “effort” and “hard work”. Other popular euphemisms are that success demands “sweat, blood and tears” or “1% inspiration, 99% perspiration”. In grade school we’re lectured on working harder and reprimanded for not trying hard enough. Put in the time and effort to get the grades that will land you the job that will require similar or increasing levels of time and effort. Olympic athletes are lauded as modern-day heroes for their early mornings, punishing workouts and restricted diets. Our society reveres those who put in 80-hour work weeks, despite their implausibility, as we all need to sleep, eat and defecate, which take up hours that are obviously not spent working. It’s a shame to some that we’re limited by these earthly, time-consuming bodies that have been the disdain of capitalism since it’s inception. I see more youth in my practice, who are already bearing the weight of society’s expectations. They are working hard, as instructed, and this “hard work” is taking a physical, mental and emotional toll on their lives. But what can they do? Success requires effort, goes the mantra of our times.
This effort shows up on faces and in bodies. Our minds exhaust us with chastising inner talk; teeth clench, jaws grind and shoulders hunch around ears, creating a new neck-less species, The Hard Worker, inhabiting the earth in increasing numbers.
70% of people today admit to being under stress. When I asked my patients if they feel “stressed”, many shrug, deny or tell me their stress is nothing that they can’t handle, and then proceed to rank their stress levels as 6 out of 10 or higher, 10 being a hair-pulling, crazy-eyed, stressed-out-of-their-wits state—I find it significant that being more than halfway to our limits still qualifies us as not being stressed.
It’s likely that admitting to stress and overwhelm is a weakness in our effort-driven society. If the bodies we inhabit fail to perform, we’ll be replaced by someone more able-bodied, or someone more able or willing to push their limits and sacrifice their health for short-term success—or maybe a machine. Machines don’t need paid vacation or sick leave. While the future seems bleak, it certainly helps with the healing business, as 75-90% of doctor’s visits are either directly or indirectly stress-related. We know that stress has the power to wreck havoc on the body, contributing to diseases, inflammation, decreased immunity, proliferation of cancer and premature aging. We know that stress is implicated in the rising incidence of mental health conditions. We know that things can’t go on as they are, the system is simply not working.
And so when modern society is failing us, it helps to turn to ancient ideas, before it all went wrong, such as Taoist philosophy, to look for answers. The Taoist principles of wu wei, or “effortless action”, tell us that action does not always originate from effort and stress. Effective actions, like creativity and good ideas, can occur spontaneously and of their own accord.
In a society where relentless growth and production are imperative for the survival of the economy, it’s hard to image any action in the absence of sheer effort. Incessant production can’t rely on the eb and flow cycles of natural inspiration and creativity to dictate when, how much or how hard we work. And yet, this perhaps says more about the societal necessities of the work available to us, and our enjoyment (or lack thereof) of such work, than it does about human inspiration. I’ve been planning this blogpost for a while and although it might have been written sooner if set to a deadline, I’ve eventually gotten around to it; here it is. It is a fact that when things need to get done, they will. The doing might happen later than we’d like it to, and yet it still happens, inspired by a genuine desire or necessity, rather than pressure-cooker of stress.
I’m often asked, as a doctor, to help support my patients’ bodies in periods of intense stress—”periods” that have gone on for years with no apparent end in sight. While there are several remedies that can help the body recuperate from the wear and tear of effort or help the adrenal glands secrete more cortisol to continue producing more and faster, there’s also only so much that can be squeezed out of tired organs. Oftentimes, as I’ve written before, the path to healing is paved with introspection and a serious reconsideration of lifestyle. Can we continue to produce and strive at our current rates and still expect to feel fit, healthy and energized? We can build faster computers and smarter phones but our bodies are very much limited to the tools nature has slowly evolved over time, including the natural medicines available to us. Perhaps our lifestyles, like the economy and the stress on the environment, are simply unsustainable. Perhaps it’s time to question how many of the activities in our lives are worth the effort.
While it may not be possible to quit our jobs, pack up and move to the Bahamas, perhaps there are small nooks in our routines where wu wei might fit and flourish. It may be possible to ease up on our own expectations of ourselves, or give up some of our conventional ideas of success. After all, is the journey to success worth slogging if we won’t be happy or healthy when we get there? Finding space in our lives to allow action to arise spontaneously may be crucial in doing the necessary, healing work of stress-management.
Applying wu wei might mean examining the intentions behind our actions and our current lifestyles. Here are some questions to ask yourself.
When is effort appropriate and when is it wasted?
Where am I trying to get to? What is my definition of success?
Is there a day/afternoon/hour in my week when I can “schedule” unscheduled time?
Are there tasks I can ease up on, laundry for instance, that I can trust will get done on their own time?
Can I agree to forgive myself when I fail to meet deadlines or choose to take a day off?
What would it feel like to stop paddling and let the current carry me for a while? Can I do this at work? At home?
In what area of my life could I allow myself a little more room to breathe?
What are my top ten values in life? What goals align with those values? What actions would help me move closer to those goals? How much does thinking of those actions excite or inspire me?
Today, I’m 30, working on my career as a self-employed health professional and a small business owner and living on my own. I’ve moved through a lot of states, emotions and life experiences this year, which has been appropriate for closing the chapter on my 20’s and moving into a new decade of life. I’ve experienced huge changes in the past year and significant personal growth thanks to the work I’ve been blessed to do and the people who have impacted me throughout the last 30 years. Here are 30 things this past year has taught me.
Take care of your gut and it will take care of you. It will also eliminate the need for painkillers, antidepressants, skincare products, creams, many cosmetic surgeries, shampoo and a myriad of supplements and products.
Trying too hard might not be the recipe for success. In Taoism, the art of wu wei, or separating action from effort might be key in moving forward with your goals and enjoying life; You’re not falling behind in life. Additionally, Facebook, the scale and your wallet are horrible measures to gauge how you’re doing in life. Find other measures.
If you have a chance to, start your own business. Building a business forces you to build independence, autonomy, self-confidence, healthy boundaries, a stronger ego, humility and character, presence, guts and strength, among other things. It asks you to define yourself, write your own life story, rewrite your own success story and create a thorough and authentic understanding of what “success” means to you. Creating your own career allows you to create your own schedule, philosophy for living and, essentially, your own life.
There is such as thing as being ready. You can push people to do what you want, but if they’re not ready, it’s best to send them on their way, wherever their “way” may be. Respecting readiness and lack thereof in others has helped me overcome a lot of psychological hurdles and avoid taking rejection personally. It’s helped me accept the fact that we’re all on our own paths and recognize my limitations as a healer and friend.
Letting go is one of the most important life skills for happiness. So is learning to say no.
The law of F$%3 Yes or No is a great rule to follow, especially if you’re ambivalent about an impending choice. Not a F— Yes? Then, no. Saying no might make you feel guilty, but when the choice is between feeling guilty and feeling resentment, choose guilt every time. Feeling guilty is the first sign that you’re taking care of yourself.
Patience is necessary. Be patient for your patients.
Things may come and things may go, including various stressors and health challenges, but I will probably always need to take B-vitamins, magnesium and fish oil daily.
Quick fixes work temporarily, but whatever was originally broken tends to break again. This goes for diets, exercise regimes, intense meditation practices, etc. Slow and steady may be less glamorous and dramatic, but it’s the only real way to change and the only way to heal.
When in doubt, read. The best teachers and some of the best friends are books. Through books we can access the deepest insights humanity has ever seen.
If the benefits don’t outweigh the sacrifice, you’ll never give up dairy, coffee, wine, sugar and bread for the long term. That’s probably perfectly ok. Let it go.
Patients trust you and then they heal themselves. You learn to trust yourself, and then your patients heal. Developing self-trust is the best continuing education endeavour you can do as a doctor.
Self-care is not selfish. In fact, it is the single most powerful tool you have for transforming the world.
Why would anyone want to anything other than a healer or an artist?
Getting rid of excess things can be far more healing than retail therapy. Tidying up can in fact be magical and life-changing.
It is probably impossible to be truly healthy without some form of mindfulness or meditation in this day and age.
As Virginia Woolf once wrote, every woman needs a Room of Own’s Own. Spending time alone, with yourself, in nature is when true happiness can manifest. Living alone is a wonderful skill most women should have—we tend to outlive the men in our lives, for one thing. And then we’re left with ourselves in the end anyways.
The inner self is like a garden. We can plant the seeds and nurture the soil, but we can’t force the garden to grow any faster. Nurture your garden of self-love, knowledge, intuition, business success, and have faith that you’ll have a beautiful, full garden come spring.
Be cheap when it comes to spending money on everything, except when it comes to food, travel and education. Splurge on those things, if you can.
Your body is amazing. Every day it spends thousands of units of energy on keeping you alive, active and healthy. Treat it well and, please, only say the nicest things to it. It can hear you.
If you’re in a job or life where you’re happy “making time go by quickly”, maybe you should think of making a change. There is only one February 23rd, 2016. Be grateful for time creeping by slowly. When you can, savour the seconds.
Do no harm is a complicated doctrine to truly follow. It helps to start with yourself.
Drink water. Tired? Sore? Poor digestion? Weight gain? Hungry? Feeling empty? Generally feeling off? Start with drinking water.
Do what you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life. As long as what you love requires no board exams, marketing, emailing, faxing, charting, and paying exorbitant fees. But, since most careers have at least some of those things, it’s still probably still preferable to be doing something you love.
Not sure what to do? Pause, count to 7, breathe. As a good friend and colleague recently wrote to me, “I was doing some deep breathing yesterday and I felt so good.” Amen to that.
As it turns out, joining a group of women to paint, eat chocolate and drink wine every Wednesday for two months can be an effective form of “marketing”. Who knew?
“Everyone you meet is a teacher”, is a great way to look at online dating, friendships and patient experiences. Our relationships are the sharpest mirrors through which we can look at ourselves. Let’s use them and look closely.
Being in a state of curiosity is one of the most healing states to be in. When we look with curiosity, we are unable to feel judgment, anxiety, or obsess about control. Curiosity is the gateway to empathy and connection.
Aiming to be liked by everyone prevents us from feeling truly connected to the people around us. The more we show up as our flawed, messy, sometimes obnoxious selves, the fewer people might like us. However, the ones who stick around happen to love the hot, obnoxious mess they see. As your social circle tightens, it will also strengthen.
If everyone is faking it until they make it, then is everyone who’s “made” it really faking it? These are the things I wonder while I lie awake at night.
Happy Birthday to me and happy February 23rd, 2016 to all of you!
According to James Altucher, author and entrepreneur, it is possible to reinvent yourself in 5 years. In his book, The Power of No, he tells us how to reinvent our lives by first saying a big, fat No to all the things that don’t serve us—toxic friendships and relationships, stagnant 9-5’s, harmful behaviours, negative thought patterns and, well, just things we simply don’t want to do—in order to free up our lives for greater happiness, abundance and creativity.
It is now the end of May. For me, May has been a month of reinvention. For the past 10 years it has been the month of closing and good-byes, specifically the end of the school year. The Canadian College of Naturopathic Medicine class of 2015 has graduated, as I did last year. Last week my Facebook feed was infiltrated with pictures of flowers, long black gowns and tearfully heartfelt thank-yous to the friends and family that got my colleagues through their gruelling 4 years of naturopathic medical education. Last year that was me—I remember the black gowns, the face-ache from smiling, drinking a little too much at grad formal and winning an award (“Most Likely to Write a Best Seller”—complete with misspelling of “bestseller”) while eating Portuguese chicken at my house afterwards with my friend F and his family. This year, one year later, I watch these events from afar. May 2014 offered new beginnings and chance for reinvention. I was dating, enjoying the sunshine, looking forward to a trip to India, looking forward to beginning a practice as a naturopathic doctor. Mostly, last May was about the death of one life—that of a naturopathic student—and the birth of a new one: a complete reinvention.
This year the rest of my life stretches before me like one long expansive road. My career is underway. My dating life is stagnant. The next steps are more like small evolutions rather than massive, monumental milestones. I most likely will not don a black gown again, but I can reinvent myself by following the 20 steps below. I can always check back into these practices when I’m feeling stuck, alone or afraid. When life is not going my way, there is always a chance to begin a reinvention of some sort. And, I remind myself, my current reinvention is likely well underway. Since I graduated last May, I have been in the process of reinventing: just 4 more years left until I complete my obligatory 5. While 4 years sounds like a long time, I know from experience that 4-year cycles turn over within the blink of an eye.
What stage are you on in your own personal reinvention? Wherever you are, follow these steps to reinvent yourself:
1) Say no. Say no to all the things that you don’t want to do. Say no to things that cause you harm: emotional harm, mental harm, physical harm, loss of time, loss of money, loss of sleep. We need to say no first before we can free up the time and energy to say yes to the things that we actually want. In fact, say “no” to all the things you aren’t saying “F#$% YES!” to. Read this article for more information.
2) Re-examine your relationships. Who doesn’t make you feel good? Who makes you doubt yourself? Who do you feel will reject you if you act like your true self around them? Gracefully begin to distance yourself from these relationships. You might feel lonely for some time, but loneliness is sometimes a good thing.
3) Clear out your junk. Get rid of everything you don’t use, don’t like and don’t need. Marie Kondo, in the Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up, tells us to donate, trade, sell or dispose of everything we own that doesn’t bring us joy. I think that that is a wonderful litmus test to decide what we should be holding on to. Personally, one thing that did not bring me joy was an awful old desk in my room. It was uncomfortable and ugly. I replaced it with a free desk someone I knew was throwing away. I also donated 7 garbage bags of things: books, clothes and keepsakes from when I was a child. Since then, I feel like my room has been infused with a little bit more joy. Remove all your joyless items from your life and observe how your energy changes.
4) Sit in silence. This could be meditation, staring at the wall, chanting or simply breathing. Do it with eyes closed or open. I start at 20 minutes of meditation—a meditation teacher I had told me to always use a timer to increase self-discipline—and work up to 30 some days and an hour on really good days. Start with 5 minutes. Sitting in silence helps to quiet the mind and bring us back to the present. You’ll be amazed at what you discover when you sit in silence. Read some books on meditation or take a meditation course for specific techniques, but simply sitting in silence can offer amazing benefits as well.
5) Explore the topics that interested you as a child. When I got back into painting in 2008, after getting a science degree when I’d always been interested in the art, my life changed a little bit. I started a blog in 2011; it happens to be the one you’re reading now. Get back into whatever you were passionate about as a child, even if it’s just a cartoon you used to watch.
6) Start a gratitude jar. Once a day write down something that you are grateful for—use as much detail as possible—and toss it in a jar or shoebox. When you’re feeling low, open up the jar and read the messages you’ve left yourself. I also tried a similar exercise with things I wanted to manifest or achieve. A few months later I read my entries and realized I’d achieved every single one. It’s amazing what kind of energy glass jars can attract.
7) Read. According to James Altucher, you need to read 500 books on a given topic in order to become an expert on something. You have 5 years to reinvent yourself, so start your reading now. Read one book and then, from that book, read another. It’s interesting where reading trails can lead us. I read one book, which mentions another book, read that book and then end up in a new world I never knew existed. I personally feel a little anxious when I don’t have a book beside my bed, but if you’re new to reading, start small. There are two books that I’ve already mentioned in this blog post; start from either of them and then go from there. The next on my list is The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron, which was mentioned in The Power of No. Who knows where that one will lead me.
8) Get 8-9 hours of sleep a night.
9) Eat your vegetables, especially leafy greens. Avoid sugar, moderate alcohol and caffeine. Eat healthy protein and healthy fats (if you don’t know what those are, welcome to my blog! browse more of my articles on healthy eating or book an appointment with a naturopathic doctor like me!—shameless self promo).
10) Exercise. Enjoy some movement every day.
11) Exercise your idea muscle. According to James Altucher, creativity is a muscle that we need to exercise lest it atrophies, like any other muscle. He recommends getting a journal and writing 10-20 ideas in it every day. They don’t have to be good ideas, just any ideas. Removing the filter of self-judgement is important for allowing creativity to flourish. We need to strengthen that muscle.
12) Get some psychotherapy. Start dealing with childhood wounds and meeting your inner critic. Address your erroneous beliefs about yourself, the world and the past. Contact me to learn where to get quality psychotherapy in Toronto at an affordable price.
13) Expand your social circle. If you find that after following step 2 your social circle has gotten smaller, start to find ways to expand it. My favourite way to reinvent my social interactions, and thus begin to reinvent my life, is to look up a meetup.com group and start attending. If you’re not sure about a meet-up group you’ve attended, give it 2 more tries before deciding not to go back. In 3 tries, you’ve either made new friends and connections or decided that the energies of the group aren’t right for you. Online dating is another cool place to start meeting people outside your social sphere and getting over social anxieties.
14) Establish a self-care routine. What would someone who loved themselves do every day? Try to do at least some of those things every day. It could be going for a 15-minute walk before doing the dishes. It could be doing the dishes rather than leaving a messy kitchen for your more tired future self. Think about what things will make you feel good and then do them. Most of the time this involves bubble baths—light some candles while you’re at it. Read this article on self-care to learn more.
15) Write a Have-Done List. Instead of writing a list of things you have to do today—your standard To-Do List—write a list of things you’ve done at the end of every day. This fills people with a sense of accomplishment from looking at everything they’ve done. It definitely beats the stress and anxiety of looking at the list of things that must get done looming before them.
16) Treat other people as if it were their last days on earth. We’ve all been told to “live each day on Earth as if it were your last.” But what if you lived as if each day on Earth were everyone else’s last? You’d probably treat them a little more nicely, be open with them, be honest with them and not gossip or speak badly about them. You might appreciate them more. The idea is James’, not mine, but I like it. I think it’s a good rule for how to treat people.
17) Pay attention to what you’re jealous of and what you despise in others. The things we are jealous of in others are often our disowned selves. If I’m jealous of my friend’s Broadway debut I’m probably disowning a creative, eccentric and artistic side of myself that it’s time I give love and attention to. The things we’re bothered by in others often represent our shadow sides, the negative things we disown in ourselves. I used to tell myself the story that my ex-boyfriend was selfish; he took care of his needs first. However, maybe I just needed to start taking care of my own needs or come to terms with my own tendencies towards selfishness. Our negative emotions in relation to others can provide us with amazing tools of enlightenment and prime us well for our own personal reinventions.
18) Let go of the things that were not meant for you. Past relationships, missed opportunities, potential patients that never call back, “perfect” apartments, etc. Say good-bye to the things you don’t get. They’re for somebody else. These things are on their own journeys, as you are on yours. If you miss one taxi, know that there are other, probably better, ones following it. So, rather than wasting time chasing after the missed taxi, meditate on the street corner until the next one comes along.
19) Listen. Ask questions. Show curiosity. When someone finishes speaking to you, take a breath and count to 2 before responding. It’s amazing how your relationships change when engaging in the simple act of listening. I love the Motivational Interviewing technique of reflective listening. In reflective listening, we repeat back the other’s words while adding something new that we think they might have meant, looking for the meaning between the person’s—your friend’s, patient’s or client’s—words. I find that this has helped the person I’m speaking with feel truly listened to. If I get the meaning wrong, it gives the other person a chance to correct me and thereby ensure that we’re really communicating and understanding each other. This one simple tool—reflective listening—has transformed my naturopathic practice and interviewing skills.
20) Be patient. Personally, I’m terrible at this. But, like you, I’ll try working on the other 19 steps while I wait for the next stage of reinvention to take hold. I’ve ordered my next book from the library. See you all in 4 years.
